if i were a boy...a.k.a. male privilege

i must confess, i have found Beyonce hard to stomach at times; in fact most of the time.

the sole reason for this assertion is that i cannot listen to music and tune out the messages. i cannot watch videos and discount the power of images. i listen to lyrics/words. i pay attention to images. i respect the truth that words are powerful and can give both life and death to the speaker as well as the listener. i honor the fact that a positive image can build you up and a negative one can tear you down---if you allow it. additionally, i have trained myself to pay attention. so it has been impossible to tune out the bootylicious, freak 'em dress, upgrade, sugar momma lyrics/images that she has jiggled, bounced, and gyrated her way through. i have felt neither entertained, amused, nor proud. being decidedly heterosexual, i haven't felt titillated either; there has been no appeal whatsoever.

i haven't really bothered to address this issue before. it has been my experience that when women make any effort to hold other women accountable for their words and/or (mis)behavior, we are oftentimes met with accusations of "hating" or "jealousy". so i had very politely turned her off and saved myself from the pollution. when she married the woman beater, who has 99 problems but a b ain't one---it occurred to me that she would have no choice but to get a clue in due time.

so i was sitting on the parking lot, a.k.a. the 101 freeway:-) when i heard this song...




...and it made me think. thanks at last Beyonce.

i thought again about the fact that we hold great power ladies. we frequently choose to foolishly relinquish it. we possess the power to change our worlds. we must strive to become better wiser women each day. in addition to doing this for ourselves, we must take the time to help a girl get these nuggets as well---it just may save her life.

you know, now that i think of it, Joe sang about the same thing..





ok. that was for me. i told you i was decidedly heterosexual:-)

back to my original point...

...reciprocity saves lives and time. check for reciprocity. demand reciprocity. settle for nothing less than reciprocity in our lives. reciprocity is the best way to neutralize male privilege, i think. what do you think? share if you feel so inclined.



SELF LOVE~SELF ACCEPTANCE~SELF RESPECT

wrestling with the block

writer's block.

it presently has a hold on me.

bear with me as i wrestle with the block.

in the meantime, i will continue to frequent those places that give me food for thought; in addition to helping me grow.

blessings all...

self love~self acceptance~self respect

the wait is over!!! time for the happy dance!!!

i am so happy and excited that i had to post the announcement.

Truth, i know, i know, i am supposed to be tagged cooperatively. my cooperation was to be my next post, however my ally is blogging and props are in order! i am sure you understand. i will honor my word this week. thanks for your patience.

folks check out Khadija's blog:

http://muslimbushido.blogspot.com/

she is an amazingly smart, gifted, courageous woman. all that are able to hear her voice will be blessed in some way. i know that i am.

YAY!!! Khadija's blog is up!!! the wait is over!


self love~ self acceptance~ self respect

let ALL that have an ear...hear!

so, this is a comment that was left on another post. i felt it worthy of center stage.

i pray that all that have an ear, hear. this message is what God loves...the truth!

i have been busy in preparation, i pray that more will do the same. NOW is the time!


"FP,

I hope you don't mind me borrowing your forum for a moment for an urgent public service announcement. This has been on my mind a lot lately, and I'm feeling more alarmed with each day that passes.

WARNING TO ALL BLACK FOLKS:

If you haven't already done so, I strongly urge you to get a 2nd source of income immediately!

Here's why:

In the midst of our mass Obama-mania, most of us really haven't thought through the repercussions of having him in the White House.

1-If Sen. Obama is elected, the days of crying to White folks about racism will be OVER. They won't entertain that anymore. After all, racism can't be that bad if there's been a Black (sort-of) president elected. This is a problem because we don't have a collective Plan B. Our entire strategy (such as it is) revolves around protesting racism.

2-I firmly believe that this economy is going to crash. I also believe that the powers that be have been mitigating & concealing the full extent of the damage to protect George W's image. They won't extend the same favor to Obama if he's elected. In fact, they'll be sure to let all of the rotten economic eggs drop to the ground on his watch. [To make sure that he gets the blame for the past 8 years of fiscal mismanagement & crime.] This is why everybody needs a side hustle. Right now. Being totally dependent on a single (more fragile than you realize) paycheck is courting disaster.

3-When the full extent of the economic disaster hits, help WON'T be on the way from an Obama Administration. At least, not for Black folks. A Pres. Obama will feel the need to prove to White folks that he's not partial to Black people or our problems. Given our hypnotic support for him, the masses of Black folks won't even scream out while he ignores us. Our elders will quietly start eating dog food instead of groceries. They'll quietly go without medication that they can no longer afford. Many of us will quietly go without heat during the winter. And they'll want YOU to suffer quietly too! After all, "we" gotta support the "brother." You won't get any support from other Black folks for crying out (or making any noise at all) during an Obama Administration. Don't let this scenario happen to you or your loved ones. Get ready. Get prepared. ASAP.

Peace, blessings and solidarity."

SELF LOVE~ SELF ACCEPTANCE~ SELF RESPECT

...so...really, super, quickly...

i know this is random.

i tend to be this way from time to time:-)

this bugger of a thought has been stuck in my head for awhile now...

...all of you folks that couldn't/wouldn't shut up about darfur, why are you now talking to me about the olympics?

??????

duh?! i am not watching the olympics this time around! maybe they can hold the next one in the congo or iraq?

i am not trying to be funny, i am just saying...

SELF LOVE~SELF ACCEPTANCE~SELF RESPECT

tell the truth and shame the devil...

...so...it has been a minute since i last wrote anything.

i have been in a season of transition. in that time i have lurked in the blogosphere, as time permits, and read and read and read. ok, i have commented as well when i could not resist the urge:-)

i sat down to write a post that would honor my commitment to be tagged cooperatively. Truth, i promise i will be cooperative real soon!

however, right now i feel led to go in a different direction.

in reading today, i came across an essay that really resonated with me. i have come to a place where i can hear the truth and appreciate it from where ever it might come. i feel no shame in admitting that there was a time when such was not the case.

there is a blog that i visit whenever i have the time. i have learned to watch how the messages flow and unfold. i have learned the hard way that too hastily embracing folks will leave me needing to severe ties when bloggers demonstrate that playing way out in left field, at black women and girls' expense, is the regular practice...

this blogger, however, has been pretty consistent in telling the truth despite all the rules and conditioning that he must cast off in order to do it. i appreciate and respect him as a result.

in all reality, i still, at times, struggle with the conditioning that mandates that i stand and fight on behalf of black men. black women are trained and conditioned to love and protect black men. black men are trained to love and protect...black men. see the problem?

my reciprocity clause has caused me to consciously work through the impulse to protect black men. especially, when quite a few black men will not make a peep as sisters are being attacked from all directions. any noise made is to add to the assaults. right now, these same black men are still deciding if they want to get serious about standing up and asserting themselves on behalf of black women and children. i would say they were waiting for a sign from God, but then there have already been many. there is instead a collective refusal to say or do anything against other black men that would make them accountable and responsible for their misbehavior.

in the interest of balance, i am sick sick sick of black women that work diligently to maintain the exploitation and degradation of black women and girls. putting these females on blast whenever possible does not trouble me in the least. i am acutely aware that men get not only their names but their games from their mothers. fathers are typically too busy doing other things. all colors. even the good ones. there are women working diligently against the best interests of black women and girls. i consider these women the enemy and will work diligently to neutralize them or take them out. please know title, religion nor age matter to me. the truth is the truth and if you are on the wrong side of it...

my wake up call has been impossible to snooze through.

my commitment to black women and girls disallows me to wake up and quietly allow my sisters to snooze to their total and complete detriment/destruction.

this blogger put into words the realization that has been impossible for me to fight against as a conscious black woman. here is an excerpt:

"Considering the high rate of murder, incarceration, and inter-racial dating among black men, and the overwhelming loyalty of black women, for every single black man walking the streets, he has a veritable harem of black women who are willing to give there bodies to him and even go so far as to take care of him. From a man's point of view, what more could any man ask for in life? This situation suits black men just fine. But, what if men of other races start to take women away from their loyal harem? All of a sudden life doesn't seem so peachy. So it's my belief that black men don't even believe most of their own complaints about black women, they just do so as a deterrent to other men who might be considering "stealing from their harem"."

sisters, read the rest of his thoughts at Other Women Don't Suck. i don't particularly like the title of his blog, however, it is his blog. furthermore, his message is spot on consistently.

allow me to say this a different way...

...those that we fight relentlessly to protect, have no real interest(s) in making our lives better. our suffering enhances their quest to feel/be/live as men.

sisters, help ain't coming! if you want to be free you will need to seize it. immediately exercise your options and create the lives you want. where there is no reciprocity, there is no place for you---flee! period. tell the truth and shame the devil---my personal choice.

questions? comments? feel free to share...



SELF LOVE~ SELF ACCEPTANCE~ SELF RESPECT

i'm proud to be an american...where at least i know i'm free...

i laugh when i see how my steps are ordered of the Lord. i feel humbled to know that all things that come to pass are with divine purpose.



recently, i felt, what seemed, at the time, like my lowest low since my journey began. my sisters, please know, NOTHING frees you quicker or more completely than forgiveness.


i have to sit with that statement for a moment...



...now, i rejoice! seeing clearly with my spiritual/mind's eye that with which the enemy meant to destroy me, will be turned and used for my good. did i tell how much i love the Lord? with ALL my heart, i do.



my heart is full of praise right now. ok. now i am switching gears...



...i don't like math. i am more artistic, creative, and love words more than numbers. i could easily eliminate all numbers with the exception of 3 and 7 without any guilt. why 3 and 7? they are my favorite numbers:-)




interestingly enough, one of my newest endeavors means that i must crunch a lot of numbers, daily. funny huh?



it also means that i get to see, up close and personal, a LOT of angry white men that want this country to return to being a free republic. return? HUH?



i addressed this same topic awhile back in Dear Dr. King . what is interesting to me is the behavior of men, most men...



...ALL colors. they insist on being "in charge" while blaming everything but themselves when things go sideways. most men engage in this practice i notice.



the country is in ruins and any suggestion that white men have only themselves to thank for it is...white man bashing! yes, despite steadfastly shutting everyone else out of the governing process and in quite a few instances even the human circle, one must never suggest white men and white folks, in general, stop the "traditional" lying and look at themselves. interesting.



despite knowing the "rules", i have decided to honor and respect my ancestors and tell the truth. i have been doing it all week. so much so that a white man had the gall to tell me that he was "sick" of hearing about slavery and the injustices in this country. this man is so entitled that he rebuked me while maintaining that the laws that govern this country are based on the bible. (so much for loving your brother/sister as you would yourself, i guess?) he went further to presume to teach me about the constitution and the bill of rights.


being who i am, i informed him that i am sick of hearing about what white men (washington, jefferson, clinton, bush, etc.) think and listening to them preach about "freedom", especially since they were/are enslaving and brutalizing other human beings while preaching their "freedom" sermons. the hypocrisy is unGodly and more than i can stomach quietly.



he indicated that the constitution and bill of rights were just as relevant today and that is why he continued to mention them. when i suggested that slavery and the after effects were as well, and suggested that the curses earned by the sins of the fathers would be visited upon the children to the second and third generation, hence cointelpro's baby, the patriot act and other constitutional/bill of rights violations...crickets...tumble weeds...crickets...ANGER!



i for one appreciate the equal opportunity born under the patriot act. now, EVERYONE gets to be angry! maybe now folks will understand that it is impossible not to feel anger in the face of injustice? will God's people now unite, stand together as one, and resist the devil as he unleashes lies, division, and suffering?



i would go into greater detail, however, there is no need to reinvent the wheel. i was reading over at Professor Tracey's and came across a post that sums it up for me. check out THE 4TH OF JULY over at BEAUTIFUL, ALSO, ARE THE SOULS OF MY BLACK SISTERS. i could not have said it better. this post made me cry, it is so beautifully written, sad, and true.



without apology, i love my people. i want us to be healed, whole, and basking in the many blessings that God has bestowed upon us.



i love my country. i want us to be healed and in harmony with humanity. i want us to dismantle the wickedness that is at the core of the foundation of this country, this will require that we have the courage to get real.



real fast.

r.i.p. Laura Nelson. she is pictured above. she was brutally raped and lynched while protecting her teenage son who was also lynched. i believe her son was accused of stealing, only to be found "not guilty" after the fact.



i will never forget nor will i stand silently and be told to "get over it". over 100 million of my ancestors perished in this "free" nation as a result of such brutal inhumanity. as long as i have breath i will continue to honor my ancestors and tell the truth. this has NOT EVER been a free nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.



i do this in the interest of...

...SELF LOVE~ SELF ACCEPTANCE~ SELF RESPECT